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Pick Me, Pick Me! (Then Give Me 30 Days to Hydrate)

We haven't had much Kevin Smith chatter this fall. There are two reasons why we probably should. First, he's in the air;  it seems that every time I bump into a 3L, Smith rears his ugly head:

Cell Phone Me: "Hey, you worked at Mega Firm USA's San Francisco office, didn't you? What did you think?"
Boalt 3L #1: "Can't talk now. Love to, but I'm learning to mail-merge."

Print-Station Me: "Please tell me those are handouts for other people, or something. You are pretty much holding your entire print quota in your hands. And it's only the third day of school."
Boalt 3L #2: "Oh don't worry, I don't have to read all this. It's just my clerkship application."

Computer Lab Me: "I'm sorry, you look really busy and I don't want to interru--"
Boalt 3L #3: "PLEASE DO! I'm proofing the spacing around the periods in my clerkship writing sample. MEEAHHHRRG! This kind of thing is what I least look forward to about being a lawyer!"

If the fact that this stuff is going down isn't enough of a prompt, there is also the comment quoted below, which was tacked onto some thread from two years ago:

Anonymous said...
Can we get a confirmation whether or not clerks for federal judges are required to pass a drug test prior to employment?
8/18/2008 1:33 PM

Nice research skills, Anon, but, er, yeah. Two years. These threads may whine, but they hardly age that way. My uneducated belief, for whatever it is worth, is that the last thing a clan of mail-mergers and period-proofers should have to worry about is a little plastic cup.  I mean, even if you fail the test you still have unparalleled abilities to mail-merge and period-proof! What really counts here??

But that's just me. It's still a fair question.

Full post as published by Nuts & Boalts on August 21, 2008 (boomark / email).