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: Say What!

By Judge Jerry Buchmeyer

May 2004 - Ask A Stupid Question ?

Hal Monk of Bedford, who confesses that he has enjoyed the et cetera column for so many years that he ?feels plum guilty for not having sent ? any contributions in the past,? sent in this excerpt from the January 1993 deposition of Hollywood celebrity Zsa Zsa Gabor, Monk?s client. Larry Macon, with Akin Gump?s San Antonio office, took the deposition.

Mr. Macon: What is your date of birth?

The Witness: I don?t know.

Q. You misunderstood my question. When were you born?

A. I understood your question perfectly well. My answer is I don?t know; don?t remember.

Q. I demand an explanation of that absurd response.

A. Before we come up here, my lawyer told me how to make a good ?

Mr. Monk: Just a minute, hold on ?

The Witness: witness or how to do good in three ?

Mr. Monk: Ms. Gabor, you don?t need to ?

The Witness: Monk said I must follow three easy steps. First, to listen to the question and be sure I know what you mean. Then, answer the question just if I know for sure. But OK to say I don?t remember or I don?t know if that is truth. Do you remember being born? Of course not. It's a stupid damn question. Now, ask me something maybe I know for sure.

? ? ?

Monk?s Epilogue: Although the deposition continued for several hours, Mr. Macon never ascertained the witness? birth date. But then, neither did her attorney.

Full post as published by Say What! on May 26, 2009 (boomark / email).