Legal Writing

5 Rules for Run-In Lists

By Mark Nichol

When brief lists appear within a sentence — technically, these are called in-line lists — they?re often complicated by excessive punctuation. Here are some errors in construction of in-line lists, and their corrections, to illustrate a few simple rules:

1. ?Sugarcane has been able to flourish in the Everglades thanks to the flood-control project; tariff and import policies such as the Cuban sugar embargo; and subsidies and price controls that keep sugar expensive for Americans.?

Even if the items in a list consist of phrases rather than simply a word or two, commas, rather than semicolons, are sufficient to separate them: ?Sugarcane has been able to flourish in the Everglades thanks to the flood-control project, tariff and import policies such as the Cuban sugar embargo, and subsidies and price controls that keep sugar expensive for Americans.? Use semicolons only if one or more list item itself includes internal commas; even then, the grammatical structure may make divisions clear.

2. ?This profile is not unlike that of the alcoholic, who has mood swings, blackouts, impulsive and self-destructive behaviors.?

If the last item in a list is a pair of subitems separated by and, an and is still required following the penultimate item: ?This profile is not unlike the alcoholic, who has mood swings, blackouts, and impulsive and self-destructive behaviors.?

3. ?Most of these complaints were not about police brutality, but pertained to issues such as: slow response time, alleged name calling, and age discrimination.?

Just as in bullet and number lists, no punctuation is generally needed preceding the first list item: ?Most of these complaints were not about police brutality, but pertained to issues such as slow response time, alleged name calling, and age discrimination.?

Exception: Set the list off from the lead-in phrase with a colon if the latter is an independent clause, as in ?Most of these complaints were not about police brutality, but pertained to issues such as the following: slow response time, alleged name calling, and age discrimination.? Such constructions are rarely necessary, however.

4. ?The study of the interplay of alcohol and violence covers a broad spectrum of activities ranging from intimate partner violence, brawls at bars, child abuse, and violence at sporting events.?

Items in a list should be grouped logically: ?The study of the interplay of alcohol and violence covers a broad spectrum of activities ranging from intimate partner violence and child abuse to brawls at bars and violence at sporting events.? In this case, the list was relaxed, obviating the need for internal commas. Also, notice that to was added to bookend the ?ranging from . . . to? completion. When listing proper names or other nouns that have no other obvious organizational scheme, list them alphabetically; chronological order is appropriate when that rationale is obvious.

5. ?Each plan would 1) restore the ecosystem, 2) clean up water pollution, 3) ensure water supply for cities and farms, and 4) improve levees to keep us all safe from floods.?

Numbers or letters employed to signal distinct items in a list are superfluous unless the items are complex, in which case perhaps the list should be set off and formatted vertically: ?Each plan would restore the ecosystem, clean up water pollution, ensure a water supply for cities and farms, and improve levees to keep us all safe from floods.?

Full post as published by Daily Writing Tips on February 02, 2011 (boomark / email).