Miscellaneous

Rep. Henry Waxman Loses His Shit ...

Posted on May 21, 2008
The reservoir of rage is unleashed at around the 2:00 mark, but the first two minutes do provide some much-needed context. And I have to say, given the evasive, bullshit answers that Waxman was getting, I think he was…

Vegas Assembly Woman Stabs Husband -- Shoe-In for Re-Election

Posted on May 21, 2008
I’m sorry, but this lady rocks. I would totally vote for her. Twice. But I probably wouldn’t marry her. State Assemblywoman Francis Allen faces a felony charge of stabbing her new husband in the arm with a steak knife and…

Want Change? Write Your Local Elected Representative. Or Choke Him. Whichever.

Posted on May 21, 2008
He hates the immigrants. He really hates the immigrants! A Parkville man charged with threatening in an e-mail to “choke the life out of” Gov. Martin O’Malley has been freed from house detention. However, a Baltimore County judge ordered Tuesday…

The Daily Memo - 5/21/08

Posted on May 21, 2008
Paper money hates blind people! (Supreme Dicta) Sorry Judge Posner, I know you’re a smart and important judge guy and all that, but I’m quite happy with my procrastinating ways. (Above the Law) “Is the government compiling a secret list…

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Sounds hilarious

Posted on May 21, 2008
Three employees at Millstone BBQ, in Ohio, have been charged with unlawful restraint after pulling a “prank” on a co-worker. When Rochelle Crockett showed up late for work, she was put into a storage shed, and the three employees (including…

Freeeeeeeeedom!

Posted on May 21, 2008
Am I nay speaking English, laddie? Then why canna the wee little court transcriber handle doin her job propa’ly? I dinnae get all dressed up in me finest kilt to come down and here testify just for her to go…

Don't you know who I am, brother?

Posted on May 21, 2008
“I’m the Hulkster, brother! And when I come into court to testify, my word is bond. And you better watch out brother, because this is my word — when you ask the Hulkster to take off his trademark bandanna and…

The Anti-Smoking Crazies Go Overboard

Posted on May 20, 2008
In at least one county in Florida, government workers not only suffer from Florida-itis, but their misery will now be compounded by nicotine deprivation: Smokers looking for work need not apply with the Sarasota County government. On Monday, a tobacco-free…

Common Sense Lesson #158

Posted on May 20, 2008
Don’t pee on old people. The mother of a 13-year-old autistic boy who was banned by a court order from attending services at a Roman Catholic church in Bertha, Minn., woke up Sunday determined to take her son to mass….

If All Else Fails, Aim for a Mistrial

Posted on May 20, 2008
What do you do if your defense isn’t going well, and you think it’s your lawyer’s fault? Beat the hell out of two birds with one stone: William E. Lehman didn’t like the way his trial was going, saying he…

The Daily Memo - 5/20/08

Posted on May 20, 2008
How do the state courts rank up against each other? (Concurring Opinions) The SEC is bringing it to a bunch of former AOL execs. (WSJ Law Blog) Getting out of Jury Duty 101. (Legal Antics) Could the Supremes be getting…

Identity Crisis

Posted on May 20, 2008
There’s this company called LifeLock which claims it can protect your identity from all the identity thieving folks out there. And CEO Richard Todd Davis was so confident of his company’s ability that he revealed his Social Security number…

It's no Wade Blasingame commercial, but it's not bad

Posted on May 20, 2008
Thomas Goldstein is the founder of SCOTUSblog and he currently heads up Akin Gump’s Supreme Court group. From Above the Law I found this little video he’s posted, in the vein of the “have you been hit by a car”…

Dang! Foiled again!

Posted on May 20, 2008
Mark Baxter had a plan. He was going to scam his local Circuit City by buying a new Sony VAIO, and then returning the box with his old computer inside. Pretty sneaky, really. Except that he forgot they had his…

McCain Still Leads All Candidates in Sense of Humor

Posted on May 19, 2008
For those of you who missed “SNL” this weekend, you didn’t miss much. Despite it being the season finale, and despite the fact that Steve Carrell hosted, there were only two good skits in the entire show. And both,…

Get Up, Stand Up

Posted on May 19, 2008
Matthis Chiroux has been in the army for almost six years, having worked his way up to sergeant. He’s done several foreign tours, including in Afghanistan, and he’s slated to go to Iraq next month. Except he’s not going because,…

Beef Jerky Bandits Crazy about Dried Meat!

Posted on May 19, 2008
It’s not theft if the cashier won’t take your goddam money. Right? A man stole three packages of beef jerky from a Fill Ups Food Store on Monday, then chased down the witnesses with his wife before lawmen caught them….

The Daily Memo - 5/19/08

Posted on May 19, 2008
The Motherboard Wars are impending, as ASUS is planning to sue Gigabyte for defamation and a disinformation campaign. (Engadget) A delivery man is back in court trying get a bite of $156 million he says Howard Hughes promised him after…

Aw, leave the poor old guy alone...

Posted on May 19, 2008
Sure, the Straight Talk Express might take a detour every once and while, but that’s just so we can enjoy the scenery….

The QuizLaw Mailbag

Posted on May 19, 2008
Got a few links in the ol’ mailbag last week which I didn’t have time to get to. Stupid real world job, and all that. So let’s get ‘em now. First, a publicist for the Washington Post sent a link…

In Case You Missed It Department

Posted on May 19, 2008
What the hell was Mike Huckabee thinking? Anybody? Anybody? In what context could that have possibly been an amusing joke? What’s even more frightening is, if you listen, you can hear the audience chuckle. As in, “Ha ha! Racially-charged…

Well I'm glad that's over

Posted on May 19, 2008
I’ve been sick of all this election business, so I’m glad we can put this puppy to bed early thanks to the fine astrologers who are currently attending the United Astrology Conference. More than 1,500 professional whack jobs showed up…

Race Card 101

Posted on May 19, 2008
Kwame Kilpatrick, representing Detroit in the Mayoral Sex Scandal Olympics, has been fighting all kinds of attacks due to his not-really-that-secret affair and subsequent horrible attempt at perjury. Feeling quite oppressed, Kwame has recently decided to pull that most dignified…

Sometimes the Universe just works with you

Posted on May 16, 2008
Yesterday, Dustin posted some wonderful pics of Emmanuelle Chriqui over on sister site Webster’s Is My Bitch. And I love Ms. Chirqui, and I love those pictures. And I thought to myself, “sexist-pig-self, how the hell can I find an…

Democrats Want Turd Blossom's Ass

Posted on May 16, 2008
Yesterday, John Conyers, high ranking Michigan representative, told two people — as heard by The Crypt — that they were closing in on Karl Rove: “Someone?s got to kick his ass. Asked a few minutes later for a more official…

Judge Encourages Suicide; Wins My Heart

Posted on May 16, 2008
This gal should give motivational speeches at area high schools: Michigan District Court Judge Brian MacKenzie said Wednesday his office still is looking into comments made April 10 by Judith Holtz. Holtz had told Michael Robert Dickey of Farmington Hills…

The Daily Memo - 5/16/08

Posted on May 16, 2008
Lawyers write bad? That’s unpossible! (Law.com) I’m happy to live in a state that now recognizes gay marriage… (LA Metblogs) …Although it might be a short-lived kind of thing. (Slate) Aw, my boy Charles Barkley, the Round Mound himself, got…

Ah, the police -- you gotta love 'em

Posted on May 16, 2008
So Car and Driver posted this little list of things to do and not do when you get pulled over by a cop. Pretty standard fare — don’t get out of the car, do what the cops ask, be calm…

Coke Smuggling 101

Posted on May 16, 2008
When you’re driving a semi truck loaded up with 18 pounds of coke, make sure you have a license plate on the truck. I mean, don’t give the cops a reason to pull you over, you know?…

Leave no teacher's sexual misconduct behind

Posted on May 16, 2008
The California Senate has passed a bill which would allow teachers to be suspended where they have had their license revoked in another state because of sexual misconduct. And yes, right now, there’s a nice little loophole that kinda keeps…

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