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Settle It Now Negotiation Blog 

Everything you always wanted to know about negotiation but were afraid to ask. From Victoria Pynchon.
Post Frequency: 12.5/day Last Entry: March 28, 2011 at 19:26:33 Recent Entries: 1036
By Victoria Pynchon
Go to Settle It Now Negotiation Blog, find other Arbitration & Mediation blogs, or browse all law blogs.
Rumors of the Death of Narrative Greatly Exaggerated
Posted on November 26, 2008For goodness sakes! Telling stories is the entire reason for dining out! Not to mention the basis of all negotiations, disputes, and the common law. See Grand Theft Auto, Twitter and Beowulf all demonstrate that stories will never die...
Quickly Resolve Your Small Commercial Cases with the AAA Expedited Case Panel
Posted on November 25, 2008Beginning today, I'll be available to handle Expedited Commercial Cases for the American Arbitration Association. As the AAA explains: AAA offers fast, convenient online claim filing through our AAA WebFile service. In addition to filing claims, clients can make payments, perform online case management, access rules and procedures, electronically transfer documents, select Neutrals, use a case-customized message board and check the status of their case...
Negotiating Thanksgiving by Being of Service
Posted on November 25, 2008Thanksgiving Day begins a season that reminds many of us that our earliest negotiation experiences were those with our family. When I was a child, these were the issues on the Thanksgiving bargaining table Who gets to snap the wishbone (does anyone do this anymore?) Who gets to sit next to gramma Who sets the table and who does the dishes Whether my sister and I have to eat what we don't like (me cranberry sauce; she vegetables of any kind) to "earn" a piece of pumpkin (my sister) or pecan (me) pie Later, in adolescence, the issues changed must I follow the parental injunction not to talk about civil rights, pre-marital sex, world poverty, and, the Viet Nam War ALL DAY long do I have to change out of my blue jeans, workshirt and desert boots for dinner may I have two Thanksgivings - one with my father & one with my mom & step-dad MUST I be nice to my sister's new husband and, of course, who sets the table and who does the dishes (some things never change) Still later, when my sister and I had married and moved out of town whose table would we gather around for the holidays: mom's, mine or my sisters how to accommodate the newly vegetarian in the family could I skip Thanksgiving in San Diego in exchange for Christmas there (without my mother bursting into tears) and, of course, who sets the table and who does the dishes Thanksgiving is my own favorite holiday because there are no gift-giving obligations; everyone (more or less) celebrates the same holiday regardless of religion or national origin; there is no limit on the amount of cream and butter that can be consumed at a single sitting; and, everyone is expected to express gratitude rather than complaint...
Thottam Confidentiality: Just Follow the Statute; Don't Get Fancy
Posted on November 24, 2008From the Los Angeles Daily Journal November 21, 2008 CONFIDENTIALITY QUESTION HEADED BACK TO TRIAL COURT By Greg Katz LOS ANGELES - The state Supreme Court has denied review of an appellate decision that had become a cause celebre for mediators concerned about confidentiality precedents...
Blog Bites Bar ; Goes to Court
Posted on November 24, 2008See the Complaint here. h/t to @taxgirl As the ABA Journal explains: A law firm contends new Louisiana lawyer advertising rules slated to take effect in April will restrict its right to comment on Twitter, Facebook, online bulletin boards and blogs. The Wolfe Law Group filed a federal suit today challenging the rules, claiming they would subject each of the firm’s online posts to an evaluation and a $175 fee, according to a press release...
Negotiating Thanksgiving Conversations
Posted on November 24, 2008I kicked off the Thanksgiving holiday season last year by having an argument with my friend and neighbor the rocket scientist about extraordinary rendition and the effect of immigrant workers on the economy. I knew I'd lost all sense of perspective around midnight as I continued searching for and emailing Tony articles that proved me right, while Mr...
Survive with the Fittest Lawyers on Evolution Day with Blawg Review # 187
Posted on November 23, 2008Leave it to a legal marketing blog -- Lawyer Casting - to choose Evolution Day for its first entry into the BlawgReviewOSphere. As blogger Joshua Fruchter explains in Blawg Review #187, because the anniversary of Charles Darwin's publication of The Origin of Species on November 24, 1859 is inextricably intertwined with the idea that only the fittest survive, Evolution Day should be celebrated with advice for survival...
This Twitter Thing is Certain to Come to No Good!
Posted on November 20, 2008There's an infinite regression angle to this.
Feeling Extorted? Mr. Molski's Serial ADA Litigation and Why We Settle
Posted on November 20, 2008Many in the legal blogosphere are buzzing about the recent Supreme Court decision letting stand a Central District injunction barring wheelchair-bound Jarek Molski from filing further ADA accessibility cases in our local federal trial court here in Los Angeles...
Potential Jurors in My Space Suicide Case Enraged
Posted on November 18, 2008Defense Says Jury Pool Filled With 'Viciousness' Towards Lori Drew LOS ANGELES — The pool of potential jurors assembled for the trial of Lori Drew is tainted by a deep animus for the 49-year-old Missouri woman accused of helping drive a 13-year-old girl to suicide, Drew's defense attorney said Tuesday...
Will Dems Ban Mandatory Consumer/Employee Arbitration?
Posted on November 17, 2008This just in on the same day I attended the AAA's Expedited Case training. As an ADR practitioner I favor party "choice and voice" in all dispute resolution venues, meaning that I frown on adhesion contracts of all types, including those that are unfairly imposed upon consumers and employees...
Cases Where Apology Would Get You Farther than Cash
Posted on November 17, 2008Excerpt below. Full story here. FORT PIERCE, Fla. – Authorities say an 11-year-old boy hit his mother in the head with a saw and then offered her $5 not to call police. H/t to @SCartierLiebel in my Twitter network.
How to Apologize on the Internet: Larry Bodine Comes Clean
Posted on November 17, 2008Some attorneys and mediators make light of the power of the apology ("it's only about money"). My education, training and experience consistently suggest otherwise. Today, we learn a lesson in heart-felt apology from Larry Bodine for a post I hadn't seen, but which Bodine himself admits was anti-Semitic...
Tobacco Settlement More Spark than Dying Ember?
Posted on November 16, 2008From Point of Law - Master & Settlement: General Tobacco sues AGs, competitors Upon the 10th anniversary of the tobacco master settlement agreement (see below here and here), we find the legal disputes carrying on. Indeed, it appears the settlement did more sparking than settling...
Negotiation/Mediation Terms of Art
Posted on November 16, 2008I have recently been asked by several lawyers to write a few posts on mediation and negotiation terminology not only because some attorneys are unfamiliar with these terms, but also because different mediators and negotiators use them to mean different things...
Are Women Better Mediators Than Men?
Posted on November 15, 2008First she's all about the election and now she's back to post-mid-Century America's gender wars? Say it ain't so, Vickie! These are just statistics from an extremely limited sample that tells more about this particular program in this particular place concerning the particular types of cases being mediated than they are about the relative abilities of male and female mediators...
Sqaundering Legal Talent from Jordan Furlong
Posted on November 13, 2008The management of the Obama campaign among the lowest level operatives (i.e., me making cold calls and walking precincts) reminded me of the way in which every organization squanders its resources. I forgive the Obama campaign its trespasses because it was run by a dedicated, exhausted, physically ill cadre of poorly paid tweens -- tweens in this case being young people in that awkward period between University and real life or University and graduate school (listen to This American Life's spot-on audio-documentary on College Voter Registration Drives here)...
Ten Ways to Promote Cooperative Negotiations
Posted on November 13, 2008Mr. Thrifty and I were discussing the increasingly depressing state of air-travel with our neighbors over take-out last week when frequent-flyer cosmetics rep Sean mentioned that U.S. Air was planning to stop showing in-flight movies for a $10 million cost saving...
Learn Deposition Skills (and Much More!) at Solo Practice University?
Posted on November 13, 2008It's official! I've joined the faculty of Solo Practice University™ Huh? I don't see that University in any tier of the U.S. News and World Report's Law School Rankings! And if it's not ranked for goodness sakes, does it even exist? Yes, Virginia, a school for legal practitioners does exist "as certainly as love and generosity and devotion exist, and you know that they abound and give to your life its highest beauty and joy...
Because All Great Negotiations Are Performance Art
Posted on November 12, 2008Bob Dylan on Creativity View SlideShare presentation or Upload your own. (tags: dylan bob) . . . with thanks to @guykawasaki for tweeting the dylan slide show!
Fact that Class Settlement Was Reached in Mediation Does Not Prevent Objectors from Discovering Factual Basis for Mediated Terms
Posted on November 11, 2008Excerpts from Kullar v. Foot Locker Retail, Inc. below. Comment will follow. [T]he fact that the settlement was reached during mediation to which Evidence Code section 1119 applies does not eliminate the court’s obligation to evaluate the terms of the settlement and to ensure that they are fair, adequate and reasonable...
How to Lose an Argument from Awake at the Wheel
Posted on November 11, 2008Jonathan Fields.Awake@the Wheel gives us 7 critical mistakes to avoid when trying to persuade someone to your point of view. Excerpt below: Jonathan's full post is a must read and can be accessed by clicking on the link above. Don’t Attack - When you verbally attack either a person or their point of view, you immediately raise their defensive shields...
Obama's Persuasive Oratory for Your Next Court Appearance
Posted on November 10, 2008Simply great post on Obama's oratory from About.com thanks to Grammar Girl in my Twitter network. Excerpt below from Barack Obama's Secret for Stirring a Crowd: Oh sure, this may look as easy as one, two, three, but the truth is it takes more than a flag-draped stage and a run of tricolons to turn an ordinary speech into great oratory...
Twitter Micro-Blog on What Negotiation Skills Lawyers Most Need
Posted on November 09, 2008brianherrington @vpynchon Patience. In terms of listening & allowing process to play out. bschuelke @vpynchon maybe not negotiation skill, but figuring out what client really wants/needs SCartierLiebel @vpynchon Knowing when to listen...
Trial Skills, Deposition Skills and IP Negotiation Skills Programs
Posted on November 09, 2008Here are my upcoming speaking and teaching engagements in November and January! I'm baaacccckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk!!!!!!!!!! Judicate West Neutral and IP ADR Mediator and Blogger Victoria Pynchon. Coach/Instructor, National Institute of Trial Advocacy: Building Trial Skills Location: Loyola Law School Los Angeles City: Los Angeles, CA Dates: 1/2/2009 - 1/8/2009 Director: Williams, Gary C...
New California Custody Blog on Making Mediation Matter
Posted on November 07, 2008See Make Mediation Matter over at Jill P. Rawal's new California Custody Blog. (right, Jill Rawal, fellow U.C. Davis School of Law alum) Excerpt of Ms. Rawal's post below. Before you go to your mediation, think about what you want. Specifically, you want to think about the following issues: Write your thoughts down and take the notes to mediation with you...
Difficult Conversations 101: Blaming Sarah
Posted on November 07, 2008There appears to be no small amount of blame to spread around for the Republican's loss at the polls, much of it centering on Sarah Palin, as if she hadn't been hand-picked and thrown out to American conservatives as a "Hail Mary" pass. Because scape-goating gives rise to oodles of litigation every year, let's talk briefly about having difficult conversations in which everyone "takes their part" in the loss experienced, failure suffered or mistake made...
Negotiating Hard Times: 10 Tips for Delivering Bad News
Posted on November 07, 2008Thanks to Russell Thomas (@3rddeadline in my Twitter network) for directing us to Ten Battle Tested Rules for Communicating Well in Hard Times by Henry Fawell (@henryfawell). Excerpt below: 1. Tell the truth. Warren Buffett said it best: “It takes 20 years to build a reputation and five minutes to ruin it...
More on the Cyber-Bullying Case from the Daily Journal
Posted on November 06, 2008Prosecutors Insist on Jury Trial for MySpace Case LOS ANGELES - In an unusual twist to an already unusual case, federal prosecutors Wednesday insisted on their right to try the MySpace cyber-bullying case before a jury even though the defense wants a bench trial...
Negotiating Common Ground: Empathy, Affinity & Shared Values
Posted on November 06, 2008What did I learn on the campaign trail? Other than breaking a lifetime phobia of the cold call I re-learned what I already knew from my mediation training and experience: share stories (not opinions) look for similarities rather than differences listen with a compassionate heart remember that behind every accusation and stated fear is a plea for help create/expand common ground be respectful of other people's point of view assist people in making new or different decisions only when they ask for it It was hot, really hot, trudging the blacktop separating dozens of apartment buildings in Henderson, Nevada the day before the election...
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well if you could get him to a mental health facility they could screen him for ...
I was being messed around with charges from Verizon Wireless. I switched carriers and did not pay the final charge out of disgust and anger at how they treat their clients. Was this the right course of action? On my cred
Yes, you can dispute the account. Paid or unpaid, a collection account is a nega...
If I unknowingly cash a fictitious check, am I responsible to repay the bank?
Definitely, please go to court! Those crooks should be behind bars!...
Is it libel to write blog posts and/or online reviews about a local business that defames one's reputation?
Libel is the form of defamation expressed in fixed-- usually written form. Sland...
Georgia D.O.A.S. has offered me $10,000 for a back injury and said that was their cap. Is the cap really $10,000 or are they lying to settle low with me?
They are low balling you, the minimum is 30,000 and unfortunatly the max is 79 t...

Can a probation officer make a decision that involves a medical decision and prohibit a person from leaving a state to get medical help?
well if you could get him to a mental health facility they could screen him for ...
I was being messed around with charges from Verizon Wireless. I switched carriers and did not pay the final charge out of disgust and anger at how they treat their clients. Was this the right course of action? On my cred
Yes, you can dispute the account. Paid or unpaid, a collection account is a nega...
If I unknowingly cash a fictitious check, am I responsible to repay the bank?
Definitely, please go to court! Those crooks should be behind bars!...
Is it libel to write blog posts and/or online reviews about a local business that defames one's reputation?
Libel is the form of defamation expressed in fixed-- usually written form. Sland...
Georgia D.O.A.S. has offered me $10,000 for a back injury and said that was their cap. Is the cap really $10,000 or are they lying to settle low with me?
They are low balling you, the minimum is 30,000 and unfortunatly the max is 79 t...








