Law Humor

• Dec. 19, 2008: "I'm dying to answer these charges.  I am dying to show you how innocent I am. . . . I intend to answer every allegation that comes my way.  However, I intend to answer them in the appropriate forum - in a court of law."
• Feb. 10, 2010: "Now I'm not just here talking the talk, I'm gonna walk the walk, which is right up to the witness stand.  And when I take the stand and I testify and I swear on the Holy Bible to tell the truth . . . I expect . . . that the government does the same." 
• June 2: "I can't wait to get on there, swear on the Holy Bible to tell the whole truth and to begin to give clarification and explanations and confront my accusers and confront those who are lying. ...  Both of us [he and his wife Patti] are eager to get up there and tell the truth and testify."
• June 8: "I'm testifying ? are you kidding? And Patti, absolutely. When people say terrible things about you, don?t you fight back?"
• June 8 [his lawyer, in opening statement]: "I'm telling you now, he's going to testify.  He's not gonna let some chubby, four-eyed lawyer do his talking for him. . . . He's going to get up there and tell you exactly what was going on."
• June 29: "[W]hen I testify, which I will ? and I can?t wait to testify, to set the record straight and clarify some of these conversations, and tell the people of Illinois exactly what was on my mind and what I was trying to do and what I ultimately attempted to do ...."
• July 19, outside courthouse: "Show of hands: Anyone here planning on testifying?" [raises own hand]
• July 20, Chicago Sun-Times: "Rod Blagojevich's lawyers told U.S. District Judge James Zagel this afternoon they plan to rest their case without having the ousted former governor testify, as he has repeatedly said he would do . . . . In fact, they don't plan to call a single witness, the sources said."

Zagel told them to sleep on it.  Trial resumes Wednesday at 9:30.

Sources: Chicago Sun-Times, AP via Yahoo News, msnbc.com