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Madoff Bankruptcy Trustee Tangos With Shana

To: Irv Picard, Esq.
From:
Shana Madoff (Starkman), Esq.

Dear Irv:

Let me see if I get this straight: your suing me, to recover a lousy $10 million in salary that I was paid over a period of 10 years for doing my job, but you're not going after Jamie Dimon for "coincidentally" taking more than $250 million out of the firm just 4 months before all broke lose??

OK..Whatever. This is to let you know that I'm firing Starkman, the crack pot over on the left, and you can negotiate the settlement agreement with me, directly.

I wen to Fordham Law School, I'm a licensed attorney, and I'm an expert in compliance laws. And, I know what I'm doing, And, I know what I'm saying, and when I sign our Agreement, it will be as credible as everything else that I've ever signed.

1. Since I've already spent every penny of the lousy ten mil that Uncle Bernie paid me over the past 10 years of my now deteriorating life, and what with Neiman and Bergdorf's canceling my cards without any reason, I'm willing to give back the shegetz to my right, and, I'll throw in a few things that I know about the bitch to his right.

2. And, don't tell me that I "should be dealing with the Feds for those two items." This whole case has become more polluted than the drinking water in West Virginia. The "Feds" are still busy surfing blogs and barfing down donuts in Uncle Bernie's office. They're clueless.

3. If you stop harassing and blackmailing me, I'll throw in (27) pair of Manolo's.Those are the only pieces of clothing that actually still fit me, Irv. I'm down to a size .5. I haven't eaten anything in months, no thanks to you, and I look like a Biafran.

But you can have the shoes anyway. God Bless. I hope your wife enjoys wearing someone else's shoes. She should only be driving Nan's Bentley!

If you want my panties, you can have them too!

But let me make myself clear; if you don't accept my terms, you're going to be looking at a $5 billion sexual harassment case. That's right; sexual harassment.

There are at least 30 or 40 men that can be accused of what you're alleging that I'm "guilty" of. More than a dozen of those people work for the government. And, if you don't know who they are, you aren't paying much attention to Bernie's Blog.

Shana Madoff, Esq.

Full post as published by Bernard Madoff on October 05, 2009 (boomark / email).